How to Slaughter an Oily Toad for Dummies

Watched SAW IV the other day to destress. Hmm.. I simply love the SAW series to death! The plot is always so sickly brilliant (even though SAW III was a wee bit disappointing) and the ending is always so unpredictable that it makes u go like, "OMG!! SHIT!! What the..."

Anyway, I suddenly thought of my oily toad supervisor after finished watching. Then, I started portraying the scene below...

Oily toad wakes up one day to find himself in a totally unfamilar place with an aquarium-look-alike device fixed to his head. He gets all panic and starts struggling and accidentally clicks the "Play" button of the tape player in his hand. And he hears a voice saying,

"Hello, Alex. I wanna play a game. All ur life as a lecturer, u enjoy torturing students, especially those from IMU. Now I give u a chance to feel what they feel. In front of u, there are ten sushis (with blades sticking out). U have to finish eating them within 1 minute. Only then u will be on the route to salvation. Let the game begins..."

Oily toad groans and starts cursing only to realize that he's running out of time. He fails his task. The device on his head is immediately filled with Pepsi (diet) and eventually drowns him to death...

Mua hahahahaha... Shiok shioK!! The director of SAW should really consider my idea for the next sequel. Kakakakaka... XD

Ok ok.. Enough day-dreaming. Time to get back to my stupiak surfactants.. T_T

If U tHinK

THIS, is scary...

It's only 1/4 of what I have to read through for EACH of my assignment.

Up until now, I have passed up 3 of such kanasai assignments already. One more to go.

No la, not the whole journal lar.. Chee sin meh? Just an article of about 12-13 pages long from each of the journals lar...

Still, it's enough to cause the damage already. I think part of my brain is now burnt from trying too hard to understand what the heck those journals are about. I can no longer think like a healthy human subject...

Shit!! See? I said human subject, instead of human being.

And now I can't even remember things that happened moments ago. Oh well, did I just tell u that I can't remember things well nowadays??? *scratched head*

And when I'm out aunty-ing, I compare prices of Sainsbury's vege with Tesco's then I think, "Hmm.. Is the difference signicant? P<0.05?"

OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOSH!!!!!

Maybe I should go read up some non-intellectual bimbotic magazines to wash the contents of the journals out...

Warning: Treatment is totally NON-evidence-based. Attempt at your own risk.

Reference: PL Chua. A non-randomized, double-unblind, placebo-uncontrolled, single center study on survival benefit of bimbotic magazines VS medical journals. Int J Chee Sin 2008; 1: 123-456.

I shall go dig my brain out and flush it down the toilet now... (-_-")

h@PpY EaSteR!! (-^_^-)

Been wanting to put this up for a very long time already...

But then la hor, got this super violent aunty who patahkan the head and limbs of her barbie doll to play masak-masak (oh my gosh!!) threatened to panggang him alive if I do so...

Now that she's soooo occupied with the kanasai PharmCare essays and that her frens are here, I guess she most probably won't have time for this lar...

Even if she does hor, like I care lar... XD So, here u go!!

WhoA!! My AH REIN is break-dancing!! So geng, right??? XD XD XD

Ooh ooh!! By the way, HAPPY EASTER!! =D That smiley face on the title was supposed to be a bunny one lar.. But really dunno how to "draw" the ears lar.. grrrrr... Wonder how I passed my Pendidikan Seni last time... Anyways, use ur own imagination lar!! XP

Just now I went out to get Unitel phone card (to call home! good girl leh?) and bumped into itu Wan Tan Minah on my way home lar.. Apparently she was damn stressed doing PharmCare essays when her laptop suddenly decided to get naughty and refuse to open any PDF file lar.. So she tak boleh tahan and came out to snap some flower pics to destress lor...

Obviously the angelic me accompanied her... In case she decided to go snap pictures of some angry dogs and then get bitten mar, right? So nice of me... I KNOW!!! XD

And she took picture of me looking like this...

Sometimes I really wonder how more silly can one look.... Uugh!!

Hmm... At least this is much better... =P

Han nah han nah... very geng lar!! Skill very good lar!! Next time pls photoshop me into the most gorgeousest supermodel-look-alike leng lui first before sending me the pics, k? XD XD

ASSIGNMENT SUCKS!!!!! XP

Hope u are feeling much better now dy... =) If not just come and kill me with lobster la, thank u very much!! XD

HAPPY!!~ =D

OOOHH!!!~~ I'M SO PROUD OF MYSELF!!!!! Read this...

"From: Emma J. Williams
Subject: Schmap: Italy Photo Short-list

Hi Pei Ling Chua,I am writing to let you know that one of your photos has been short-listed for inclusion in the second edition of our Schmap Italy Guide, to be published mid-April 2008.

www.schmap.com/shortlist/p=13968830N03/c=SG3110731

Clicking this link will take you to a page where you can:

i) See which of your photos has been short-listed.

ii) Submit or withdraw your photo from our final selection phase.

iii) Learn how we credit photos in our Schmap Guides.

iv) Browse the first edition of our Schmap Italy Guide.

While we offer no payment for publication, many photographers are pleased to submit their photos, as Schmap Guides give their work recognition and wide exposure, and are free of charge to readers. Photos are published at a maximum width of 150 pixels, are clearly attributed, and link to high-resolution originals at Flickr.

Our submission deadline is Sunday, March 23. If you happen to be reading this message after this date, please still click on the link above (our Schmap Guides are updated frequently - photos submitted after this deadline will be considered for later releases).

Best regards,

Emma Williams,

Managing Editor, Schmap Guides"

La Scala Opera House, Milan, Italy

And THIS, is the photo she was talking about. Nyak Hahaha Haha... They will attribute it under my name if it's published!! WhoA!! I'm so super-stoked!! Was bugging housies asking whether "Pei Ling Chua" or "Chua Pei Ling" sounds better.. Chose "Pei Ling Chua" in the end.. Kakaka... =P

Seems like my photo-taking skill is not bad afterall!! NYAK HAHAHA HAHA... XD And my Sony-Ericsson K800i is quite geng also!! Mua hahahaha.. Aiyo.. How nice if incentive is given lah... Kekekekek... *Greedy* =P

Happy happy~~ (^^,)v

tHE 5tH tIMe!!!!!

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Stupiak ang mohs from G-3 triggered the fire alarm A.G.A.I.N!!!!!

Wah lao eh!! Just when I finally found the journal I want!! Kacau betul lah!!

Somemore my progression just now was quite fast eh! Nerdy mode finally switched on liao... Such thing doens't happen to me everyday one, okay?

See la see la.. Now it auto shuts off itself again and look what I am doing here... (-__-")

Even my hair was in nerdy mode just now.. i.e. tied up high with hair-band capturing my fringe firmly so that it doesn't fall all over my face and cover my view and stuffs.. U know, like Sadako from The Ring? But I look scarier than her with my hair band on lar..

The thing is, I HAD to walk out of the building with that hairstyle!!! Luckily it was 12noon and the sun was high up in the sky. If not ppl sure think JBC is haunted lor...

Hmm hmm... AND, I thought it would be quite easy to get evidences for management of myocardial infarction but I was SOOOO freaking wrong!! All the clinical trials also damn lao pek and outdated.. Like, what, 1984? I wasn't even born, man wth! So there was obviously no online version whatsoever and I gotta carry them all the way back from the library...

Man, journals ARE heavy!! T_T

L@St uNdeRGr@d leCtURe =(

We had the last lecture of our undergraduate years officially today...

='(

Even though I can't wait to get away from all the sucky assignments that I'm on now, I AM SERIOUSLY going to miss this...

It's been a long and tough way... well, not really that tough until lately lah..

We have gone through all these together, hand in hand...

All the way from Malaysia to Scotland...

The companionship is the best one could ever ask for...

Feeling sad dy lar... Wuwuwu... T_T

Batchmates, u guys/gals are THE BEST OF THE BESTEST!!

AM SO PROUD that I am one of the P105-ers!! =D

Love u peeps REAL LOADS!!!!!~~~ MUACKS!! =)

P/S. Whose idea was it to put that lesbo pic of me and Yi Jie lar?? Spoil market saja!! Grrrrr... Already no boyfren lor!! *depressed* =(

P/P/S. We DID NOT actually kiss, okay??!!! It's the angle, the angle!!

tHiS Is wH@t sTResS c@N dO to OnE...

OK, so it was our dearest Wan Tan Minah's 32nd (Oopsy!! I mean 23rd) birthday yesterday. So, we went to ka ka cau cau at her place after a formal celebration at Mussels Inn (Uughh!! Am so gonna ban Mussels Inn from now on.. 4th visit in 2 months time!! Gosh.. XP).

Being inspired by this super hilarious That ad on Li Ping's blog,

we channel our stress from having to meet endless assignment's deadlines into this... (eh! Don't curi ayam! Watch the previous vid first!)

MUA HAHAHAHHAHAAHA... ROFL ROFL

ROFL!!!!!

*kena SOB* cough cough cough...

That was freeeeeeeeaking stupiak + lame wei!! Guess which dumb ass our sexy momma Yan Nee was imitating? *hint hint: PEPSI* XD

I seriously wonder how Yan Nee managed to keep her face + voice straight while saying,

"King Kiang Kong Kiang Kong, Peppermint Field Gel"

WAH KAKAKAKAKA... Yup! Malaysians are idiotic.. So what?!! XD

I sO w@Nna W@tcH

"The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus"!!!!!~~~

Not only because it's the late Heath Ledger's last film,

but also because Johnny Depp, Colin Farrell & Jude Law had recently agreed to complete the unfinished role of Heath Ledger in the movie!!

Also, the story is about a magical mirror capable of taking people into different dimensions. Sounds super interesting, doesn't it??? =D

Last chance to appreciate Heath Ledger's performance plus 4 of the most leng chai actors in the industry together in one film!!!!! Oh my gosh!! I can't wait!!! =P

Anyone joining me??? (^^,)v

sTUpI@k G-3 aNg MoHs

Wah liao!! Know what? We had fire alarm drill early in the morning again yesterday!!!

It was 4:50a.m. this time... 4:50A.M.!!!!!

I just handed in my CPP essay 2 days ago and obviously I was tired like anything la. Was sleeping like a pig when the fire alarm went ringing like nobody's business. First thing came into mind..

"Wah liao!! Is this a prank ah?? Am I dreaming??"

Then realized that I wasn't and reluctantly dragged my heavy ass out into the cold winter night.. Left Ah Rein behind this time. No mood la.. Super cranky!! Afterall, I assumed it wasn't a real fire and so he most probably wouldn't be burnt to death one la.. Oopsy!! Sorry, Ah Rein!!! XP

Apparently it was the ang mohs staying in G3 unit again. This was their 4th time triggering the fire alarm liao eh!! Yet they didn't have any guilty look on their faces for waking the whole world up!! The trigger of their last three records was the same, i.e. smoking!! Kanasai eh!! Annoying dao~ Go smoke their heads off la, stupiak!!

According to moody + cranky + sleepwalking firemen, the fire alarm this time round was triggered when those stupiak ang mohs were "cooking dinner". HUH??! What?!! Dinner at 4:50a.m. are u kidding me?!!

Aiya.. maybe they were trying to "cook" their lungs with the smoke from their cigarettes la WTH...

By the way, the fire alarm at 5:45a.m. few days ago was caused by our fren who was cooking breakfast in preparation of GP Visit. Of course it's forgiveable!! Plus, breakfast makes so much more sense than dinner, okay?!! And our fren went around apologizing for the accident..

BUT, our fren was scolded "Don't u know how to close the door?" while these stupiak chimneys of G-3 were spared!! How unfair!! Now only ang mohs can trigger fire alarm at God-forbidden-hours but Chinese can't lar??!!! DUH!!! Ciak sai!!!

Some ppl are simply jerks..

fIrE aLArM @ 5:45A.M.!!

Whoa!! This is seriously something worth mentioning!!

Just came back to my room from the freezing cold outside. We just had a fire alarm drill at 5.45A.M.!! Look closely, it's 5:45A.M.!!!!!

It practically woke almost everyone up from their sleep, except for some of us who were still up doing CPP, and some of us who had already woken up.

Well, surprisingly, I belong to the latter category this time!! Cause I happily K.O.-ed at 10p.m. last night. Supposed to wake up at 12a.m. to do my CPP one lar, but when I opened my eyes, it was already 5a.m. liao.. SHOOT!! (T_T)

Those who were still sleeping apparently got very cranky la.. So I happily raised their cranky-ness level by letting my Ah Rein to flirt with them (specifically referring to Chua Ming & Vermicelli Law).. XD Even sexy firemen also appeared cranky eh!! XP

And hor, I realized that ang mohs are seriously CHEE SIN one.. Apparently they hadn't slept yet cause they were still in their outdoor attire & stuffs. And guess what they were doing? DRINKING!!! Oh my gosh.. They still had that wine in their hands when they came out!!! ALCOHOLIC dao!!!!!

Seems like the drill was caused by my neighbour's adjoining unit. According to sexy firemen, they forgot to close the fire door when cooking, which I don't really think so lar, cause we did smell and see smoke coming out of their kitchen's window. Will update u kepo ppl as soon as I get to "pat" something from my neighbours. Kakaka... =P

JuSt fOUnd oUt tH@t...

Octopuses have got blue blood and...

THREE HEARTS!!!

Wow, that's so COOL!~~

Does that mean they will have to suffer at least 3 bouts of Myocardial Infarction before they die of acute coronary syndrome??? XD

Shit.. I sound completely like a nerd... XP

UNDERAGED DON'T LOOK!!

It's 3:30a.m. now.

It snowed an hour ago. Beautiful.. But,

I could only admire it from my room window cause

I have got tonnes of journals to read,

to find a way to treat severe alcoholic liver disease, a disease

stupiak alcoholics brought upon to themselves from chronic binge drinking.

F*CK!!

Just chatted with Jocelyn on MSN and

we were gossipping about this certain someone that we don't really like.

I mean, WTH?!! Gossiping at this hour??!!!

And we found ourselves could be such a...

BIOTCH!!!!!

LMAO... XD