我哭了。。。

九月七号的我，哭了。。。

已经不记得我最后一次掉泪是什么时候的事情了。。。因为哭，真的很难。。。无论我多难受，眼泪始终留不下来。。。这并不是件好事，也不值得我骄傲。不能哭的感觉，有时真的让我痛不欲生。。。一整颗心就好像要爆裂开来了，却始终找不到一个抒发的管道。。。真恨不得有人能拿一把锋刃的刀子，直插入我的心窝。。。这样至少心就不会再那么疼了。。。

我也不晓得昨天的我，为何那么地脆弱。。。更难过的时刻，我都潇洒地在不撒一滴泪的情况下经历过了。。。但，昨天晚上，眼泪却情不自禁地掉了下来。。。我真的好难过。。。好难过。。。难过得直到目前为止，我的情绪都始终平复不来。。。在人前，我企图装作若无其事。。。应该没人察觉到我的不同吧。。。大家或许都认为我只是压力太大了吧。。。是吗？

也许不愉快的事情，纠缠了我一整天。。。也许考试与作业的压力，让我忙得透不过气来。。。也许身边出现了个让我非常失望的人。。。也许人生的无奈让我觉得束手无策。。。也许我真的是个很失败的人。。。也许离乡背井的孤寂包围了我。。。也许我太放肆我的忧虑了。。。也许在夜深人静的鼓吹下，我开始胡思乱想了。。。也许我太在乎了。。。也许我恰好在听着伤感的歌曲吧。。。也许。。。也许。。。

我。。。哭了。。。

StUpIAk liBrARy dReSsCOdE

Yay! It's a holiday for P105 today and I was in super good mood. Decided to come library to study for the upcoming Biopharm class test on Monday. Wanted to dress in a most comfortable way so that I could study. So I wore a white-coloured collar shirt with jeans. Not too formal, nor too casual. Then, I proceeded to the library.

Who knows before I could even enter the library, I was stopped by the librarian.

"Excuse me, no jeans in the library until 5p.m. onwards."

Honestly, I was mentally prepared for this already. Told him I had no class today and I came to the library to study only. He insisted that he was just following the rules and that I would not be permitted to enter the library unless I changed into a more formal pants. Well, I was not in the mood to quarrel with him and I knew that it was not his fault that the stupiak dresscode had been set this way.

So, I went back home to change into a cargo pants, of which I seriously do not think is any more formal than the dark-colored jeans I was wearing previously. By the time I went back to the library, I was sweating like hell already. Weather super hot, man!!

I went into the library straight and purposely asked the librarian whether my attire was ok or not. Then, in a friendly way, I told him,

"Sir, no offence, but I just want to let you know that it's seriously not practical to apply this dresscode to someone who is not having class. I just want to feel comfortable so that I can study better..."

"I know I know... I know it's not practical, but I have to follow the rules. Otherwise, my boss would scold me for allowing students to enter the library in jeans."

See? Even the librarian also agreed with me! Stupiak IMU! Why can't you be more flexible with your stupiak so-called dresscode? Wasted so much of my time! What's the point of looking smart and professional but not being able to study well and then fail our exams? Do you know how uncomfortable it is to study in formal shirt and formal pants? Eat shit la!

Am so gonna voice this out if there is a suggestion box in the library... Too bad there isn't one... Again, STUPIAK!!!

Hahaha...... (Stress-induced insane laughter) =P

ChUA pEi LiNg

Got this from Friendster bulletin board. Hehe... Frenz, come come... Check out what meaning your name carries. I wonder if the analysis of mine is an accurate one. Kaka... XD

A- You like to curse alot (Do I?)
B- You like people
C- You're wild and crazy
D- You have one of the best personalities ever
E- Damn good kisser (Haha... I wonder... XD)
F- People adore you
G- You never let people tell you what to do
H- You have a very good personality and looks
I- You have a fine ass (Hmm......)
J- Everyone loves you
K- You are really silly
L- you live to have fun
M- one to have fun
N- You are dead sexy (Kakaka... Yeah, I hope so, too =P)
O- You are one of the best in bed
P- You are popular with all types of people
Q- You are a hypocrite
R- Fcukin Crazy
S- Easy to fall in love with
T- You're loyal to those you love
U- You really like to chill
V- You are not judgemental
W- You are very broad minded
X- You never let people tell you what to do
Y- one of the best damn bf/gf ne one could askfor
Z- Always ready.